Happy New Year!

I can't wait to see you all in one piece...

I can't wait to watch your bubly shape wander..

I can't wait to hear your voice babbles...

I can't wait to touch your face..

I can't wait to kiss your lips..

I can't wait to make you smile 8D

I miss you~

my cute little alcohol

hehehe~

These words might not be enough to fill your already filled heart

but I would just like you to know that...

I will never let go.

How did I miss everything?

Well, I was away from home drunk last Monday; and was grounded from using the net because I slept late making video clip in the oldest Windows Movie Maker in the planet... Yea, I sound so pretty bad and disobedient. I admit that. But I'll try to resist alcohol next year coz I was so wasted for hours the other night, which made me realize that am still alcoholically novice. And btw, my boastful 17year-old uncle was here I had to, as usual, tour him around the city, and all that freaking jazz, though I had fun hanging out with him coz he always made me laugh my ass out whenever he bragged about something…which was obviously untrue.

Today is cousin Paolo’s BIG DAY! Wow. He’s legal now, I wonder what he’s doing. He must be very happy. Hmm… I wish him all the best… I’m just so sorry because I cant upload the video clip on Facebook, as promised, coz FB can upload a video which is only 1mb something with a run-time of 20mins. The clip I made is 17.4mb though it's roughly 3mins only. Sad. But I’ll upload it on YouTube some other time cuz 8) Happy Birthday and have a good time :) Keep smiling. And I made the letters already… Hope you’ll like them…They're very very simple you don’t deserve to have them… I doubt if I’ll give it or not.

 Agaw A called last night. I am quite relieved to hear her voice. 

I'm still stinky today. Runs to take a bath 8D

 

"All alone in an empty room
nothing left but the memories of when I had my best friend
I don't know how we ended up here
I don't know but it's never been so clear
We made a mistake, dear.
And I see the broken glass in front of me
I see your shadow hangIng over me
and your face, I can see...

 Through the trees
I will find you;
I will heal the ruins left inside you
cuz I'm still here breathing now...
I'm still here breathing now...
I'm still here breathIng now...
until I'm set free.
Go quiet through the trees"

Ha ha ha ha~

I had fun last night, though I miss agaw anna and paolo. I've just finished reading their blog entries - Agaw anna posted an entry while agaw paolo, as he was, so lazy to sit and write his ass off...

My cousins and I went to church last night. It was so funny - we made a child cry without doing anything to her. So the mass was boring, as usual, although it freshened up my heart, and cleared my mind somehow. What's funnier? I went to church without "proper" clothes on: I wore short-pants with flip flops hahaha...

I quote pretty "What a weird costume." What? Did she say costume? hahahaha! Hey it wasn't my fault. They forced me to go over their place and even forced me to attend the mass...so i couldn't change.

SO PARTY:

Hala bira!

WRY! I only had 3 shots of the 

lamest vodka ever made.

 Did we just say "keso"?

Don't blame me, guys, please? :p

These are very sweet, in all fairness...

yum yum yum yum..

Obviously? The camera loves me...

 

Currently on the loose waiting for the 28th. Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas!

I had fun last night 8D except having "blue balls"...

I'm in pretty's house atm. And god knows how disappointed I am: my aunt called around 12 noon, asking me to come over to have the spaghetti done. I was preparing it all right, until I noticed that the sauce was not enough. It was not enough...though it tasted fine...but it was not enough!!!

I am so happy because I have friends...

Agaw Anna called earlier this morning and thanks for that.... though i dunno if I can call you guys back coz I don't think I'd be home until tomorrow or the next day. We'll gonna spend Christmas here, or anywhere with the whole family...without drinks, of course...the absence of my sweet alcohol is just making me even thirsty.

 I love this shot.

 I HAVE A STOLEN SHOT!!!

Who could tell?

Then again, who could tell??

raw and unedited...

>Comments?

I am totally washed out today. I've been critically thinking about simple things which could either make me smile or make me laugh... I'd choose both. It's good to fall either way though. Just want to write today. (because PW is here jamming with my two biological cousins, pretty and justine) And I heard she said my name.. ugh.

On the other hand, I feel so ridiculous everytime Kuya Chubby wants to confess something...he said he'll tell me about it this Eve.

*goosebumps everywhere*

and now? Im waiting for a call... But I gotta go. Still have to take a bath and do something cute to stay cute! :P

And my aunt said the whole family is going to Tangub after their work, but I dont like to go with them. Not now when I have some things better left to do.

ME BABBLES ON LYRICS

“So you see, this world doesn’t matter to me.

 I’d give up all I have just to breathe the same air as you ‘til the day that I die…

I can’t take my eyes off of you…”

 –A Twist in my Story – Secondhand Serenade

Another boring day has come. It’s killing me softly but it has to be this way. I’m gonna be like this for two months this summer. And thinking about that really makes me jump off from a cliff, or drown myself in an unfathomable pool. It’s too early to tell. But I know that’s exactly what I’ll feel or, perhaps, do. I don’t know why I feel this way. The whole world seems to fit-in; its verity is shrinking behind my mind; and I feel so morosely breathing without your eyes, your face, your words, your everything. I am not like this before. I didn’t like to take permanent things seriously. But now it will be so hard to live if you don’t exist here in my life anymore.

“And I miss you more, whenever I think about you…” – Moment of Truth – FM Static

My mind is restless. The lyric explains everything. How I wish I could just go somewhere, hang around a little, and stab myself dead. Sounds cool, than think of someone who doesn’t even think of me, right? Okay. Truth is, I miss my cousins P and A. why are they making these letters btw :D  I wanted to have the coffee trip today, but cousin A has to go somewhere so it’s moved on the 28^th. ‘Til the 28^th guys!!!

“Maybe I know somewhere

deep in my soul that love never lasts.

And we've got to find other ways

to make it alone but keep a straight face.

And I've always lived like this,

 keeping a comfortable distance and up until now I had sworn to myself that I'm contented with loneliness.

Cause none of it was worth the risk.

Well you are the only exception.”

 – The Only Exception – Paramore

Yah I… I don’t know what’s up but you are the only exception to what I have been…had been… I come to thee…

For the finale:

“I am finding out that maybe I was wrong
That I've fallen down and I can't do this alone
Stay with me, this is what I need, please?

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you
We could sing our own
But what would it be without you?

I am nothing now and it's been so long
Since I've heard the sound, the sound of my only hope
This time I will be listening

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you
We could sing our own
But what would it be without you?

This heart, it beats, beats for only you
This heart, it beats, beats for only you

This heart, it beats, beats for only you
My heart is your's
This heart, it beats, beats for only you
My heart is your's”

- My Heart - Paramore

           

Waah I love this song today, tomorrow, and for the rest of my life. I am so bored. I have been screaming and making noises here, dragging my voiceless voice to its limits.

Currently on the loose thinking about doing something cool: I want to make a little, effortful _ _ _ _ for someone’s big day :) hope I can finish the whole thing…but I guess I can’t :(

Christmas Is Here!!!

Can I Spend It With You~

The more time passed by, the more I missed you.

YESTERDAY everything had been so boring? I don’t mean to hurt my aunt or anything. I just want to be honest. So we went to Eliberta Spring Resort in Mahayag, Molave, Zamboanga del Sur; an hour and a half travel from Ozamiz City; and I felt so bored and conscious. I haven’t been there though, but I fidgeted the moment I got inside the resort – there was no signal plus I saw several people watching behind my back. We arrived at the resort around 11am; grilled some meat pork and fish; took plenty of pictures; saw Alvin my Tour1 classmate and sir Marjun fresh grad COA faculty; and got iced up after plunging myself in the fresh water.

AFTERNOON we stopped by in Tangub City to fetch my grandma and had strolled around the plaza. Tedious, but nice.

LASTNIGHT my aunt was kinda bitchy. I was struggling to edit my blurred shots when she was snagging the laptop away from me. Add that she took one of my pillows for my grandma. NO WAAAY! I was totally fucked up. No not my pillow! CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT TWO FUCKING PILLOWS ON A SINGLE FUCKING BED! My grandma is sleeping in my room btw. No problem about that. (Except the pillow) Ill have it back. And I needed someone to talk to…

NOW there’s just a big question mark in my head, which is totally confusing… I know we’ve started this thing without a strong foundation(?)… and I know we can end it in just a snap of our fingers but I don’t really want that to happen… I really really don’t want to… because I love you already... And I feel so uncomfortable because you said that you dont like to have any relationships.

SO: I really did not txt you because you said you don’t like that, and it might like annoy you or something and I didn’t have signal, not even the faintest one.

 is this a garbage can? 

The white thing is the smoke, it's captured!!!

I love the smoke...

 My camera-freak cousin! HAHA

We understand eacher other simply because

we both are CAMERA-FREAKS!!!

yeah yea yea.. end of the show~LA SALLE

BAAAW~

|I LOVE YOU|

JUST WORDS (?)

THE SHEET CONTAINS: Can you define yourself well?

I bet you can’t. That’s what I’ve been thinking about.

There are just people who can’t control their personalities. Or let me just rephrase that sentence – There are just people who have weird personalities. Yes, too weird to be a friend of. But there’s nothing wrong about being weird, freak, jerk and a nerd in the most awful way. I can personally go with and befriend them. But it does not mean they can do whatever they want me to do beyond the line, and I dont stick my nose on their tails. Who are they to me? Who am I to them? If they don’t consider me as  a friend, then why should I fit myself to their awful, hideous, insensitive and inconsistent personality/manner/attitude? – They’re nothing!   

Obviously ranting, but indirectly whining.

Okay. I had fun last Friday night to Saturday dawn. Haha I cant forget that night.

ATM -

 It does look like a cross, doesn't it?

So it's a cross...it's pinned on the wall

 Just look at the rays... I love it. Minus the people

Not a good shot but i like the droplets..

 

 Zoom it in! You'll see droplets freeze! 8D

only if the image quality is not decreased

Okay. I've 5 shots of this thumbler...

The lights came from the built-in flash. I shot this infront of a mirror.

It looks good - soft and composed

minus the blurred stickers on the mirror and 

the orange thing (a secret)

It has always been me.

And I've got plenty of pics like this...

And I hate that camera already.

Currently on the loose with my agaw and sometimes with some friends doing cool "trips" - foods, movies, music, liquor, poker && discovering mooree... If I feel like going inside the cubicle, I will. But I don't think I like to, atm, because the cubicle made me feel like awful. BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE INSIDE ARE AWFUL IN NATURE.

SENSES

There I see

the unwinding journey

the undying hope...

There I feel,

the throbbing pain

the growing heartache...

There I touch,

the comforting heat

the pleasing cold...

There I taste,

the soothing hunger

the satisfying thirst...

There I smell

the seducing scent

the trending aroma...

There I hear

the tearing melody

the exciling tune...

There my heart

there it parts...

There my life

there it falls apart...

This ain't my camera... But am using it anyway

what's focused~blur me baby

ALRIGHT. Exam, Exam & Exam. But I dont care! I just want to have a lovin' and cuddlin' babies 8D and i found them already - bottles of alchol and the snap of the camera.... what's lovelier?

gibberish and sluggish

Lord of the Day where are you~hoo~

Wry. Wry. Wry.

So I'm alone, and so what if I am? Dang, today's Sunday and I can't stop thinking about picshurrs... Gaaad I don't feel like going out today. This is precisely one of the most sluggish day ever... cameras don't even inspire me now... fuck those i have to go out and take pics I am so not in the mood. I like it though, people wont dare come and talk to me if i am. So what's the fuss? Nah. I dont feel like I have friends because HELL IM JUST LITERALLY TALKING TO MYSELF. Is that good? Yes, maybe. Everything is quite reserved for blogging the snags anyway... I would rather do this than talk half of my brains out. Daah? It's like you're half-baked crazy or something gushing all the words out from your dirty viscid mouth. i don't exclude myself dont worry 

So what does a rooster does if he lost his mate? Nothing really. Hahahaha

So seriously, I had spag and chocolate cake for breakfast. Pretty's neighbor, Manel, who's studying in LSU, had a debut last night, that explains the spag and the cake...YOU WANT ME TO TALK ABOUT THE SPAG??? Ok. The spag tastes AWFUL and I am being true to that adjective because I fucking love spaghetti! Now, I curse whoever made it!!! 

So the crazy and paranoid housemate is back from attending the mass. She was all skimpy. Ha.

So Im currently listening to Best Friends Forever - A Bird A Sparrow singing "I feel sick when she is gone~~"

If...if my cousins are coming, I will never go out and take pics. I am tired!!! PERIOD. Plus I dont feel the essence yet....Plus the camera is moody - doesn't shoot sometimes...

A Cold Snowy Tale –

A Firm Fate, Uncanny Truth

A gushing wind blows upon the deep cold crevice;

Each blow hit my long slender body

Pushing me away deeper, and deeper,

Holding me aback from the unseen monsters of the snow.

I lay down on the frozen ground whence the panicking trek,

I hold my breath, listen to the whirls of the strong panicking wind.

I found a sanctuary beneath the wrath of the snow-storm

Like a house, a home that does not grow old.

The frozen ground moves and rattles,

Then all at once the crevice is covered with thick snow –

I am now stock inside, waiting for my last breath to come,

Musing the moments I have had in life…

I recount the times that I nearly die like this

Then my spirit and determination suddenly grow,

It moves and shivers my bones, it makes me say and quote:

“‘I don’t want to die, just yet’”…

I shove the hard snow away from the crevice

It’s freezing even more, like a rock being hardened twice…

I reach my axe and crack the snag apart

But it won’t budge, never will…

Then it makes me think:

If I stop right now, I will definitely die.

If I will continue breaking the snow, I will most likely survive

And I dare my fate…

I snap the hard snow in front of me,

Ten strong swing of the axe, it wounds.

Fifteen tough swing of the axe, it severs a little.

Another thirty sway of the axe, it shatters at last!           

I can already see the clear blue sky,

I can already feel the heat of the light from the sun,

I can already breathe the warm fresh air around.

So the storm has ended, it will never come back.

I step out from the crevice at last.

And gently I walk following anew trek.

But then I step on a hollow hole that’s covered with snow

And off I fall down, down, down…

It’s very dark and cold.

Above I can see a tiny white dot.

I must have fallen feets away,

Dying immediately before I think I will.

I never thought this will end like this

I tried my best to escape the truth – even the death

But this is probably a fate I opt to follow

Because I tried and I failed and I couldn’t change it after all…

I am shivering now.

My whole body is in pain,

The temperature is killing me now…

I lost my breath. This is the end.

Okay, just got so lucky today. Pish! I was thinking about so many weird things today and I want to sort them out which I ought to sort out right. Baby baby~

11pm something tonight I feel so...bored? Like I want to send text messages to people but I don't really like to... Paarrggh! I'm in cousin Pretty's place btw, so, uber boring add that I don't understand her emotions: her mother and she will fly to Manila at 8am tomorrow to get-together with her father who was from the wide waters of Europe now on the plane coming back here in the Phil. Their rendezvous is in Manila where they're gonna  have some tour thing and more... and guess what? Pretty is not excited! She doesn't even want to go if she only had a choice.

Now I am not thinking about anything else anymore. Even my crappy article...because Paolo already decided to make my title. GAAAD thanks. Haha... (i fucking miss him and oh, send me bottles wahaha)

Now I am thinking of ate nobie... this is too impossible... but ugh, really. Ate nobie is the coolest thing on earth  i have known so far who knows/loves Photography... Gaad I am stunned after she took a photo of the piled benches inside the House of Prayer... The color composure was so good, with shades of fine, soft and plain features; plus the focus that gives awesome impact on the eyes. 

Now I am kinda excited to go out capture the moments. But the truth is, I don't like to...not yet...Well perhaps I need some time to be out of perplexity because there are so many snags inside my head. They're hodgepodged inside... I need a twist, and a gin..or anything uncanny...

[No I dont understand this entry]

 

 Paparazzi? No. 

[BLOGS AND MORE]

|Da da da dan|

My life is so demeaning!

TODAY

I don’t want to post something horrible about my life anymore. But I have to. It is like am going to get used to it – this is my life – full of horrible stuffs! Life’s like this: people come and go. And worst, they’re making awful things just to have something to do. As what I’ve said, “You’re putting colors on it.” This is all about her again. Am sorry. I don’t really give a damn but she’s gone to the point of being so unreasonable. This is shite! I shouldn’t have talked to her that way in the first place. I should have been contented of what she’s been doing to me! Fuck to the bones. It made me shiver! But ha! I don’t care…really. I have friends and I don’t need her anymore… But she’s been so good L It’s all WASTED: our friendship, our ate-mangud thing – all gone to waste. And I have been so presumptuous enough to believe everything she has said.

Naaw I…I have to extract all my fucking words out…GOD KNOWS HOW SORRY I AM FOR AGAW PAOLO… he’s all but blaming himself for everything. Please, what am I going to do for you to stop blaming yourself?! TELL ME!! TELL ME!! TELL ME!! I feel awful really, to be the reason of everything that’s happening… SHIT. But I am also thankful. Very thankful to have someone to lean on – ANNA. J

REVIEW (My personal fuck ups)

The Twilight Saga - New Moon

Anew tale of the Twilight Saga has come to the silver screen at last. Teenagers were lavishly squeaking in front of the wide screen, taking every dialogs in, remembering each picturesque, and falling in love to the both “heavenly bodies” of Edward and Jacob. Avid fans even have teams of them both – Team Edward and Team Jacob.

The characters were portrayed fittingly; enough to amuse both readers and viewers. Kristen Stewart fit Bella Swan. She had brought her character to life. Robert Pattenson for Edward Cullen did well too, but with more savvy-ness which was not quite necessary, though. Laurent Taylor for Jacob Black wasn’t much emphasized in the movie. He lacked the enormity of the body which was supposed to be what a Jacob Black was. The Cullens, in general, were much different from the previous movie, Twilight. They were now five steps higher accentuated as vampires – paler and cosmetics were darker.

But for some, it was another movie not worth watching for.

All in all, the entire movie was for children. It neither fit nor will fit for the General Audience, since aged and unromantic kinds of people do really get bored from this movie. Add that the lines were inaudibly spoken. They must read the book first to understand what the characters said. The same as the book, New Moon in moving picture was boring…until the scene switched to the part where Jacob (Laurent Taylor) shifted from his human form to his wolf form; the pack of wolves chased Victoria; and some scenes in Volterra.

~AND BAAW~

"...and blow me all your tender kisses..."

wee he's singing 8D

photo by knowbee

PEACE> I DIDN'T WRITE MY ARTICLE....YET